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Posted by JRM on March 06, 2001 at 17:03:21:

OK, not really, but now that I've got your attention and your blood pressure up, here's an excerpt from the latest PADI spam sent to yours truly:

Dear Fellow Diver,

Thank you one and all. January certification numbers were 11 % higher than last years. We were trying to figure out which of our
marketing initiatives have created this demand. Then it hit me. More than 200,000 PADI divers now receive this newsletter. We've been
asking you to get a friend and get wet. Well, you have been doing a great job. I will give you the credit for the ten of thousands of
new divers entering our industry. (Besides, if I give credit to the sales and marketing department, they'll want more money.) So, thank
you very much, but please don't stop. Find at least one person a day to share your excitement and enthusiasm with for our great sport.
Then, point them in the direction of your PADI Diver Center or Resort.

More than 100 employees from our worldwide offices attended the DEMA (Diving Equipment and Marketing Association) 2001 show in New
Orleans, Louisiana. It was a major success. Diving Science and Technology (DSAT), a division of PADI, launched the first course in its
new TecRec technical diving program, Tec Deep Diver. The course was extremely well accepted by the Technical Diving community. However,
it is not recommended for everyone. We welcome you to check it out at you local dive center, but be patient as it might be a while
before they are ready to teach the program, the prerequisites are high and it is demanding!

We also highlighted our expanded line of products for the Bubblemaker program. Dads, moms, aunts, uncles, siblings and others should
look into throwing a Bubblemaker party for the kids in their family. I think roller skating rinks and Chucky Cheese Pizza Parlors are
feeling a little nervous. Call your local PADI Dive center and set one up. By the way, its easier to clean up after than a regular
birthday party, just dry the kids off and take them home. Mom's liking that already...

OK, first off, someday I would like to be a technical diver, but it seems that PADI wouldn't really be my first choice of an agency. But, I can start with only 10 logged dives, and the rest of the agencies recommend/require many more. I don't know, sounds pretty easy :-)

Second, I can't imagine anyone crazy enough to try the trick mentioned in paragraph 2. I'd think he was kidding, but PADI has no sense of humor that I'm aware of. Heck, when I was younger, I was told that you should be a touch older prior to starting to dive, becuase the N2 had bad effects on bone growth. Guess that one went out the window (not that it matters, I turned out short anyhow, and missed out on getting wet). But hey, if you want to put 20 or so seven year olds in a hostile environment using life support gear with zero training and no lifeguard, be my guest. Man, the personal injury attorneys must be salivating!


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