Posted by EIC on August 25, 2001 at 20:02:09:
A spokesperson for the SPCA reported today that veteran scuba diver,
'seahunt' (that's the only name they could get) drowned today while diving
off the popular La Jolla Shores beach. Apparently he was testing out
innovative, but very unproven diving gear called 'DIR'.
When SPCA Instigators asked his buddy, Cabo Wabo, (that's what he said)
what happened, he said that they were diving at about 80 feet along the
edge of the Scripps canyon, when seahunt's mouth piece second stage of
his regulator popped off the air hose. He said that he initially tried
to get ahold of the hose, but for some reason it was very long and was
wrapped around seahunt's neck (apparently intentionally... there's a
lot this reporter just cannot figure out about this very tragic event).
When he couldn't reach the hose, he apparently tried to use his backup
regulator, but the other open hose had already drained his tank. He then
tried to swim to the surface, but never made it. Cabo Wabo was quoted as
saying that it was a terrific effort by seahunt, but at about 20 feet
from the surface he passed out and all he could hear was the fat lady
singing.
Cabo Wabo then took him the rest of the way to the surface and most of
the way to shore before local SPCA agents finished the retrieval. At
shore the agents were quoted as saying something to the effect of 'yep,
just like a mackeral'.
When Cabo Wabo was asked why he didn't assist seahunt sooner, he told
this reporter 'I couldn't do a thing. Just look at that backplate. See
how those shoulder straps at the top cross each other instead of going
straight up over the top. Well, that's not strictly DIR compliant, so
there wasn't a thing I could do for the poor stiff. It's good gear
though and could be made compliant, so I did bring him the rest of the
way in.'
seahunt promised to post his side of the story a soon as he could get
his lungs inflated again. Though clinically dead, he seemed to start
twitching every time a well filled bikini passed.
It was a beautiful day at La Jolla shores, sunny, warm and clear. A
good day for the beach.
That's all the news fit to be news. Thank you from the EIC