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SCUBA Moose Joke - New for 2005 Season


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Posted by tleemay on October 24, 2005 at 21:14:39:

In 2007, the local Los Angeles Food Bank had realized it had
never received a donation from one of the area’s most
successful lobster hunting teams, the Moose Brothers. So, the
volunteer in charge of contributions called on the bug hunters
at their office in hope of persuading them to contribute. “Our
extensive research indicates that out of an average sport take
of 650 lobsters a year between you two, neither of you have
provided a single one to the local food bank as charity.
Wouldn’t you like to give back to the community in some way?”
the Food Bank representative asked.

The two Moose Brothers sat there behind their desks a few
moments and quietly discussed it amongst themselves. A moment
later, one of them replied “First, did your research also show
that our cousin is unemployed and has severe medical
nutritional crustacean requirements she can’t afford? And that
without this food source she cannot survive?”

Embarrassed, the Food Bank rep mumbled “Uhhh…. No.”

“Second, that our older brother, a disabled US veteran, is
blind, confined to a wheelchair, and is in no way able to shop
for, prepare and feed food to himself as non-handicapped people
can?”

The stricken Food Bank Volunteer began to stammer out an
apology but was cut off.

“Third, our sister’s husband was killed in a tragic automobile
accident” the first Moose Brother said with his voice rising in
indignation, “leaving her to feed three growing children on a
very meager income…?!”

The humiliated Food Bank rep slumped in her chair, completely
beaten, and replied simply, “I… I had no idea…”

On a roll and in unison, the two Moose Brothers cut her off in
mid sentence one final time “… AND WE DON’T GIVE ANY LOBSTER TO
THEM, SO WHY SHOULD WE GIVE ANY TO YOU?!?”



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